Mojo Monday ~ Be the Change

Michelle Fairchild



I look up at the stars and I feel both small and big at the same time.  Gazing at the stars leaves me with both a sense of wonder and a realization that we are all on this planet together, connected.  This week’s headlines in the world news left me feeling sad.  Headlines that feature violent acts, which in turn illicit fear, anger, misunderstanding, disconnection, and calls for revenge and yet more violence.  Such stories can lead people to grow fearful of people that they don’t even know and it can lead to beliefs that there is an “us” and a “them.”

Recently my husband and I saw a bumper sticker that read “I am already against the next war.”  Yes, indeed, that is how we both feel.  Yet, what can we two small individuals do in the big scheme of things to prevent something as big as war? 

I have been reading a book in bits and pieces, as there is much in it to contemplate and digest.  The book is by Ed and Deb Shapiro and is called Be the Change: How Meditation Can Transform You and the World.  The authors include amongst their own stories the stories and words of more than one hundred meditation practitioners.  Those included vary from Oscar award-winning actress Ellen Burstyn, to Jon Kabat-Zinn who is director of the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine, Health Care, and Society, to best-selling author and inspirational speaker Marianne Williamson. 

In one section entitled “What One Person Can Do” here is what is written:

“One person can make a difference, as we have seen many times throughout history.  Usually, the only thing that stops us from stepping out and taking action is our own sense of inadequacy or doubt.  Rama had a vision of bringing people together, and, as a result, nearly 10,000 Soviet and American citizens have participates in her Citizen Summit programs.  And yet when she began this work, she was a housewife and a yoga teacher with no idea how or if she could do anything.”  Rama Vernon shares this about her story “The Cold War was at its peak.  The Korean Airlines disaster had recently occurred, bringing us very close to a nuclear war.  As I put my children to bed, they would ask, ‘Mommy, are we going to be blown up?’  ‘No, of course not,’ I would reply, reassuring them as much as myself.  ‘Our government would never let that happen.’  And then, through my yoga-teaching work, I was invited to travel with thirty others on a Peace Mission to the Soviet Union.  So, quite unexpectedly, I was in Moscow, standing in the center of what Reagan had termed the Evil Empire, behind what Churchill has called the Iron Curtain.  I was raised to believe that our thoughts create our reality, and what scared me most was that I was not alone in my fear, that thousands of Americans shares those same fear, and that if enough of us continued to hold those fears, we would create the very thing that we feared most.  I realized that the only way to change such a stereotype that we have been conditioned to believe is to bring people face to face with one another.  We could not take the Russians to the United States, so I resolved to bring the United States to Russia.”

While there is a great deal of depth in this book, there is also sometimes humor.  One such moment is when Ed Shapiro’s shares a personal story about him and his wife Deb’s private meeting with HH the Dalai Lama: “After some thirty minutes of discussion, I was feeling so moved by this gentle, simple, and loving man that I just wanted to stay there and learn from him.  I did not want to leave!  I was completely in love with the compassion and wisdom emanating from this delightful being.  Finally, I said to him, ‘I don’t want to leave; I just want to stay here with you!’ I thought he would say yes, how wonderful, I recognize your sincerity, but instead he just smiled and said, ‘If we were together all the time, we would quarrel!’”

It was both surprising and refreshing to hear that a revered spiritual leader and icon like the Dalai Lama could admit to at times being quarrelsome.   It also led to a brilliant realization by Ed when he shares this about relationships:

“So, relax, if HH the Dalai Lama, someone who meditates for a few hours every day, can quarrel, then so can we!  Inevitably, there are going to be times when a relationship is troubled, when differences collide and egos clash, when stories and histories intrude, or needs are not met.  But the holding on to such disagreements and the ensuing shame, blame, and hostile silence is the real problem.  There will always be times of flow and times of discord.  Having a disagreement or even getting angry does not make us an angry person; it is not the whole of us.  Who we are is still basically good; we needed to make a point and just may have done it in a rather unskilled way.”

Interfaith Peace mandala
When Deb and Ed Shapiro were with the Dalai Lama they also asked him what they could do to help humankind to awaken to caring and kindness.  The Dalai Lama said that people of different religions should come together in peace and respect and talk openly, honoring each other’s differences and similarities. 


Do you meditate?  If yes, do you do it regularly and why? 

What are your thoughts about being the change?  Do you feel empowered to create change? If yes, how?  If no, why?

What do you think you could do to make a difference? 


In the midst of events taking place on the larger political scene there are things that give me hope and that demonstrate how people from around the world want us to come together in peace.  On elephantjournal.com I came across a slideshow of photos taken at a pro-USA demonstration in Libya following the deaths of four Americans, including Ambassador Christopher Stevens.  You can find the slideshow of photos by clicking here. 

I have also been following the Israel Loves Iran campaign on Facebook.  The photos, letters and stories that continue to be published on-line are incredibly touching and show the very personal side of people who do not wish to be at war with one another.  Here are a handful of the photos that have been shared.





Hillary Clinton also made powerful remarks in light of the recent violence.   



If you would like to read more about meditation and transformation ~  Here are some more stories that appear in the book Be the Change:

Sylvia Boorstein – “The point of meditation is to keep the mind free of confusion. Meditation, past calming our nerves, past being good for our blood pressure, past allowing us to work out our own internal psychological dramas, which it does, past helping us to get along with our kin and our community, is a way of really deeply seeing the truth that the only way to ameliorate our own suffering and the suffering of the world is to keep our minds clear.”

Robert Gass and Judith Ansara – “We can get lost in the story, which usually has fault or blame attached to it—I’m feeling this because this happened or you said that—and so we have learned to just drop the story.  Even when we are not in the place that we would like to be, we do not process about how we got there or about how we are going to get out of it; we just stop, because otherwise we can start tearing at each other.  Usually, one of us will say, ‘Are we having a conversation that is contributing to the greater good?’  We get connected first and then talk about what was disconnecting us, rather than tearing at each other from a place of disconnection, thinking that will get us connected.”

Seane Corn – “First yoga changed my body; then meditation changed my attitude.  Then I realized that whether my practice was fifteen minutes or four hours was irrelevant because it was not about how yoga changed me, but how I, through this practice, can being to change the world.  What I really felt was how dare I not step into the world and hold that space?” 
“I first started by working with child prostitutes in Los Angeles.  I did not know how my life was going to change when I entered the shelter, but I met my shadow there.  I hated those girls —and it wasn’t just girls, it was young boys too—they were so arrogant and defiant as they were so wounded.  They were also like a mirror in which I saw the part of myself that had been abused, and how I had nto dealt with my own defiance, arrogance, or wounding.  They really did not accept me at first.  Are you kidding?  This big-mouthed, floppy-headed white girls from new Jersey bounding in to tell them how to do yoga?  They slaughtered me!  It was the most humiliating experience I had ever had because I went in trying to fix them.  I did not go in there recognizing that I am them.  They took one look at me and were totally unimpressed.  No way I wanted to go back.  I sat in my car and cried and cried. The next time I went, I was way more humble as I had recognized that we were there to serve each other.”

Ajahn Sumedho – “We are not isolated entities; we do affect each other.  The more we experience this in meditation, the more we recognize how our own relationship to society need not be one of just being critical or putting up with or ignoring it, but of using our abilities, intelligence, and talents to serve each other.  If I feel a sense of ‘me’ as a self-centered isolated being, then I will just think of my own immediate pleasure or needs and I have no relationship of sensitivity to anything else.  But as I open to the truth of our connectedness, then I have a respect for all life; I no longer see others as just there for my own selfish exploitation.”

Kirsten Westby-  “I needed to mediate before I could even leave my room in the morning.  It gave me the strength to recognize that suffering is the human experience that we all have in one form or another, and not to feel overwhelmed by it, not to lose my balance…I worked with Urgent Action Fund for five years, traveling into war zones and listening to stories of what was happening to women and girls…More than anything else, meditation released me from anger.  I could feel anger coming up, but I knew that my way of surviving and working in this context was to let it go, to know that these boys were not the enemy, but were just as much a victim of this whole machine of war, forced into the army at such a young age.  Really there was no enemy; it was just a whole environment of people who had been used and abused.  I would constantly remind myself of their human qualities so I could start the day without any aggression.”

Joseph Goldstein – “There is one basic understanding that helps us in every dimension of relationship; that each one of us is totally responsible for our own emotions.  Some time ago, I was in a relationship with someone and as we were having a little argument, she turned to me and said, ‘Stop making me feel aversion.’  I started to laugh, which, of course, did not help the situation, but nobody makes us feel anything.  How we feel and how we relate to what we are feeling is completely up to us.  Generally, we blame others for how we feel; we think others are responsible for our mind states.  If we all took responsibility for our own emotions, then most of our interpersonal relationships would be a lot easier.”  “If we have the view that other people are responsible for how we feel, then we are turning over all the power to them.  We cannot control what other people do—their minds, their attitudes, or their behaviors.  But if we understand that how we are feeling is completely up to us, then we can reclaim that power.  Then, no matter what anybody else does, it is up to us how we react, how we relate.  Nobody can make us feel a certain way.”

Mark Matousek – “Albert Einstein described human self-absorption as a kind of optical delusion of consciousness.  Our obsession with physical survival prevents us from seeing beyond this primitive level, which is why meditation is so mind blowing.  Dropping below the animal level, we discover another way of seeing and being that is more vast, inclusive, loving, and durable than the fearful, self-protective mind we use ordinarily.  With meditation, prayer, yoga, or some tool for reaching through the selfish mind to our greater nature, we are doomed to remain in the animal mind.”

Mojo Monday – Our Stories

Michelle Fairchild

What do we know about the world?  How do we know what we know?  We might respond that we have learned about our world through books and classes we have taken in school.  What it comes down to is that our human world is based on story.   For thousands of years stories were memorized and passed down verbally through the generations.  Once written language came into being stories were recorded in written form.
I have always loved stories and probably because of this I became an avid reader at a very early age.  I also loved learning about the world, different cultures and the history of the people who have inhabited this planet for thousands of years.  My six year old twin daughters just started first grade and we had an option at their school to have them take an early morning enrichment class in which they will learn Spanish and about Latin culture.  One day after picking them up from school they were excited to share with me the new Spanish words they had learned that day.  They asked me “Where do people speak Spanish?” and I explained a bit about Spain and then how the Spaniards had traveled to what is now known as Mexico, and how the language was adopted by this other land.  My daughter Aubrey then asked me from the back seat “Mommy, how do you know all these things?”  It was such a curious question and I responded that I had learned about these things from books and classes and that my love of history led me to take a lot of history classes. 
While I may have a college degree in history I sometimes still wonder “What is history?”  Sure there are some hard facts involved with so-and-so being born on such and such a date, or a war beginning in a particular place on a particular date, but those facts are part of a bigger story, a human story.  While we may think that our history books are based on facts, they are also infused with the perceptions and biases of the historians that wrote them in their current time.  How historians view something in a particular era, century, or even in a particular decade, changes and evolves, because the historians themselves are going to be influenced by their own life story, which has been formed by the time period they grew up, their personal views, opinions, prejudices and personal experiences.   There are also the ones behind the scenes, such as the publisher or the powers behind a publishing house, who may have their own ideas or agendas into what gets published and what doesn’t.  One may try to be impartial and unbiased, but our own stories will and can color how we respond or view things.
One of the papers I wrote for a university history class compiled how the  historical perspectives changed over time regarding Booker T. Washington and W. E. B. Dubois and their roles in the civil rights movement.  Both hold a significant place in American history and African American history.  It was fascinating to see how the historical views and opinions regarding these two men shifted and evolved through the years. 
Card from The Voice of Knowledge deck by Don Miguel Ruiz

Where I am leading with this is to a much more personal level.   We all have stories.  Our lives are stories, series of happenings, events, activities, doings, and while some fade into the mists of the past and out of our memories, others stay with us.  Some of them are certainly, and hopefully, positive, and bring forth feelings of nostalgia and can even have the power to conjure up feelings of contentment and happiness even in the present moment.  Yet our human nature also gives us a tendency to remember and hold on to events that were painful, and if we give our stories power and hold to them tightly, these stories can affect us deeply.   We can even give them the power to create very real psychic wounds.  The painful stories, if held onto too tightly, and believed in strongly enough, can unfortunately lead us to negative spaces and dark places. 
Just like any other person walking this earth I have my own collection of stories. Stories about my childhood, my family, events that took place, traditions carried on, my young adulthood, my relationships and on and on and on.  Some of the stories were sweet, others comical, some were painful, and I even allowed a few to take me to dark wounded places.  Some life events came into alignment though that led me to delve deeper into my stories, sometimes so painfully, that I went through what I describe as a dark night of the soul, and yet the healing that took place on the journey has been most remarkable.  These life events include: choosing a life partner, moving, marrying, becoming a mother to twins, struggling in my marriage, shutting down, gaining 100 lbs, retreating from relationships, experiencing shifts in friendships, questioning my life purpose, developing cracks in my rose-colored glasses, entering into therapy, learning to accept, then like and love myself, forgiving both myself and others, finding a tribe and community (Cosmic Cowgirls) that nurtures me, gaining courage, taking chances, entering into marriage counseling and therapy one more time, claiming to be an artist and writer, writing, painting, learning, teaching, loving and grasping the true meaning of grace.
I have been contemplating and wondering about how we hold onto and process our pain and wounds.  What I realize from own experiences it that it took doing a few key things that culminated in me seeing my stories with new eyes.   The first was the talk therapy that helped to purge all the really old stuff that had been crammed into my soul for way too long.  Yet, I know that talk therapy would not have been quite enough to help move me through my process.  What also deserves a great deal of credit for the personal growth and healing that took place is the work I have done with Cosmic Cowgirls.  I entered into the tribe via attending the Bountiful conference in October 2008.  The work that Cosmic Cowgirls is doing is revolutionary.  There is a reason that women from all walks of life, artists, writers, therapists, healers, poets, dancers, singers, spiritual leaders and creatives of all types, are being drawn to the courses and workshops being offered.   While some women may be initially drawn to the painting portion of the classes, or others to the writing part of the classes, it is how everything is blended together spiritually, that leads one through a process unlike any other.  
What is it that Cosmic Cowgirls offers that promotes healing and personal growth? As an example I will share my most recent experience at the Cosmic Cowgirls Feast of Frida Story Weaving workshop.  Our Cosmic Cowgirls always begin with us gathering in circle.  The space is safe and sacred.   During our circle time we share in the Red Thread Ceremony where a long red thread is passed from woman to woman as we share our names and usually some word or sentence that gives insight into where we are at or what we wish to gain from our experience with one another.  The Red Thread Ceremony always concludes with each woman getting to keep a piece of the red thread as it represents how we are all connected to one another. 
In this particular workshop we were focused on artist Frida Kahlo and yet we also took it to a very personal level by reflecting on our own stories.  We created paper altars over the course of the two days and they came into being from prompts, by quiet reflection, journaling, sketching, some one-on-one sharing, and then turning the stories into art with drawings and paintings. 
This particular process had us pick one particular story from our past.  In the first corner of the panel of the altar one was to share a story about something that had happened.  An example given was of a woman who was told her art wasn’t any good while the art instructor tore up her picture.    In this particular version the person was then to depict what she decided about herself based on that one experience or story.  In this particular situation the woman decided or came to believe that she had no artistic abilities.  The next panel or part of the story was to share how this experienced had informed who she was now.  In our example this woman feels sad and feels creatively stuck.  In processing this story she is asked if this story is true.  Does this one experience really mean she is not an artist?  Does the opinion of this art instructor really mean anything?   The woman was then asked to claim a new belief about herself, in essence to create a new story for herself.  In her new story this woman gets to claim herself an artist and free her creative spirit. 
Card from The Voice of Knowledge deck by Don Miguel Ruiz

What I found refreshing for me during this experience is that most of my old stories had lost their charge.  I knew what the old story was and I could write about it and talk about it, but I no longer felt that emotional tug when I thought about it.  It was an aha moment of realizing how far I had come in healing old wounds.  Writer and inspirational speaker Iyanla Vanzant states that “When you can tell the story and it doesn’t bring up any pain and tears, then you are healed.”   I found that when it came to creating my own personal altar I was much more focused on my image that represented me today and on what I was claiming for me now and in the future.  Most importantly I really believed what I was claiming, rather than it being wishful thinking or about where I wanted to get to at some point in the future.
Creating new stories for oneself may take some time.  It may also take time to release old stories.  Some questions to ask yourself as you consider your own stories are “How does this story serve me and my life?”  Is it helpful?  Does it make me feel good or bad about myself?  Is it healing or hurtful?  If it protected me in the past, do I still need protecting now? 
You can also consider viewing your own stories through a more neutral and objective lens.  If you have ever felt that you are not enough.  Take a step back and ask yourself “Is that true?”   
Author Kris King who wrote a beautifully thoughtful book called My Heart Has Wings: 52 Empowering Reflections on Living, Learning, and Loving wrote this about telling stories, “If you want your future to be a repeat of your past, keep telling your story.  If you want your future to be a bold and daring adventure, start dreaming. The choice is yours!” 
At Cosmic Cowgirls we believe that you get to write your story, paint your story, dance your story, dream your story, sing your story, create your story and most certainly, even turn your story into poetry.  

Mojo Monday ~ Equilibrium

Michelle Fairchild
Contemplate U by Larry Poncho Brown

Lately I have been feeling more contemplative and observational about life.  It seems as if I know quite a few people who are facing very difficult health issues or life challenges.  Some of them are people I have known most my life.  The pattern of life can sometimes seem very rote for all of us with our daily routines, but then life also has a way of throwing the unexpected at us too.  Sometimes life is incredibly joyful and everything seems to be going our way.  Then a day arrives when life seems really hard and we feel very challenged by health issues, job losses, tragedy, death and more.   

During a particular difficult time we may even wonder, “Am I going to get through this?”  I have certainly felt that way at times.  Back in 1995 when my fiance died in a car accident I wondered for a great long time if I would ever be able to feel happy again.  The loss felt so deep and profound.

What I have learned from my own life experiences is that we humans are remarkably resilient.  We are tough, even when we may feel weak and are incredibly sensitive.  Life really is much like a roller-coaster and there are always going to be ups and downs.  There will be good times and tough times.  Even just remembering inside our head the phrase “This will not last forever” can help pull us through.  Though of course the other side of this coin are that those magic and blissful moments, that we sometimes wish could last forever, but alas cannot, because even the great and good things come to an end.  Yet have no fear, more great and good things are always ahead of us too.  

I think that trying to see that there is a bigger picture and a longer view to life, can help us get through the darker days.  If we choose to live our life more this way, the dips of the roller coaster of life don’t seem as scary or an pronounced.  I think we can choose to learn from our life experiences to flow more with the ups and downs.  There can even be comfort in knowing that a particularly difficult time won’t last forever.  We will rise again.  

Here is a wonderful essay along the lines of this topic by author Charlotte, Davids Kasl, PhD from her book Finding Joy: 101 Ways to Free Your Spirit and Dance with Life.

“It Matters, But It’s Not Serious”

“Having balance in our lives helps us find joy.  Keeping our equilibrium is about letting things matter yet realizing they are probably not of earth-shaking seriousness.
People who get lost in the ‘it matters’ side of the equation tend to treat every little ache, slight, upset, mistake, or rejection as if they qualify for headline news.  Someone slights them and they hold on to it, chew on it, bear grudges, or get obsessed with it.  On the other hand, people who don’t let anything matter tend to grin and bear it, numb out natural feelings, and say ‘ It’s fine’ even when their best friend betrays them, the roof leaks, or their feet ache.
Both of these approaches leave out part of the picture.  If you tend to create a big drama about life’s bumps, you might want to develop your ability to realize that it’s not terribly serious –it’s only a cosmic blink in time.  On the other hand, if you tend to tough out situations and play the martyr, you might want to give yourself permission to let things matter a lot more.  let yourself feel your anger, jealousy, sadness, frustration, hurt, or resentment.
One way to balance the two concepts is to first let it matter.  When something upsetting happens, let yourself feel the disappointment.  Don’t swallow it.  Don’t rationalize it.  Feel it.  Otherwise, it fests away inside.  Then, after you have had a good fit or a good whine, back off and put the experience or problem in perspective.  Look at the big picture,  Find a phrase that brings you back to yourself, and puts things in perspective.  (I remind myself that I have shelter, a warm bed, food, friends, and work, and the rest is gravy.)  Then write it down and put it up someplace so it will be there when you need it.  The more we accept our inner world and the less we deny, the more we come home to our center and the dwelling place of our joy.”

Do you feel you are able to keep your equilibrium?  Or are there things that set you off kilter and make it difficult to stay balanced?

Do you have a phrase that helps you keep your perspective?

What do you think of the phrase “It’s only a cosmic blink in time?” 


Mojo Monday ~ Duality

Michelle Fairchild
“The conflict of who we are and who we want to be is at the core of the human struggle.  
Duality, in fact, lies at the very center of the human experience.
Life and death, good and evil, hope and resignation, coexist in every person
and exert their force in every facet of our lives.  
If we know courage. it is because we have also experienced fear;
if we can recognize honesty, it is because we have experienced deceit.
And yet most of us deny or ignore our dualistic nature.”
~ Debbie Ford

“Duality” ~ art journal pages by Michelle Fairchild

The above quote by writer Debbie Ford appears in the introduction for a book called The Shadow Effect: Illuminating the Hidden Power of Your True Self.  The book was written by  three best-selling authors, Deepak Chopra, Debbie Ford and Marianne Williamson.  In the introduction Debbie Ford goes on to write:  “If we are living under the assumption that we are only one way or another, inside a limited spectrum of human qualities, then we would have to question why more of us aren’t wholly satisfied with our lives right now.  Why do we have access to so much wisdom yet fail to have the strength and courage to act upon our good intentions by making powerful choices?  And most important, why do we continue to act out in ways that go against our value system and all that we stand for? We will assert that it is because of our unexamined life, our darker self, our shadow self where our unclaimed power lies hidden.  It is here, in this least likely place, that we will find the key to unlock our strength, our happiness, our our ability to live out our dreams.”

Debbie Ford continues on about how the shadow effect is everywhere.  “Evidence of its pervasiveness can be seen in every aspect of our lives.  We read about it online.  We watch it on the nightly news, and we can see it in our friends, our family, and strangers on the street.  And perhaps most significant, we can recognize it in our thoughts, see it in our behaviors, and feel it in our interactions with others.  We worry that shining a light on this darkness will cause us to feel great shame or, even worse, to act out our worst nightmares.  We become scared of what we will find if we look inside ourselves, so instead we bury our heads and refuse to face our shadow sides.  But this book reveals a new truth — shared from three life-changing perspectives — that the opposite of what we fear we will experience is what actually occurs.  Instead of shame, we feel compassion.  Instead of embarrassment, we gain courage.  Instead of limitation, we experience freedom.  If left unopened, the shadow is a Pandora’s box filled with secrets that we fear will destroy everything we love and care about.  But if we open the box, we discover that what’s inside has the power to radically and positively alter our lives.”

The dark side, the shadow effect, duality, paradox, and unresolvable dilemmas, have been a recent theme that had drawn my attention recently.  I first began reading about unresolvable dilemmas in a book called Unflappable: 6 Steps to Staying Happy, Centered, Peaceful No Matter What by Ragini Elizabeth Michaels.  I briefly touched on this topic in last weeks Mojo Monday post called Unresolved Dilemmas where I shared a poem about paradox.  

Then there was a fascinating novel I picked up, and then couldn’t put down, called Impossible by Nancy Werlin.  The author shares that the novel began to take shape for her sometime in the mid-1990’s.  She shares that “I had begun thinking about the ballad Scarborough Fair, as recorded by Simon and Garfunkel.  As a teenager, I found the song beautiful and sad and oh-so-romantic….But thinking about the ballad’s lyrics as an adult—and focusing fully on the words themselves, rather than the gorgeous melody and harmony or the mood evoked by the music — I found myself puzzled and then a little horrified.  The man, singing, demands one impossible task after another from the woman, and if she doesn’t deliver, the she’s no ‘true love’ of his…It’s really a pretty cruel song, I thought.  There’s no way that woman can prove herself to that man.  He’s already made up his mind.  I listened some more, and then suddenly I thought: He hates her.”





Consider these stanzas from the ballad Scarborough Fair for yourself:

From the sting of my curse she can never be free
Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme
Unless she unravels my riddlings three
She will be a true love of mine

Tell her to make me a magical shirt
Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme
Without any seam or needlework
Else she’ll be a true love of mine

Tell her to find me an acre of land

Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme
Between the salt water and the sea strand
Else she’ll be a true love of mine


Tell her to plow it with just a goat’s horn
Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme
And sow it all over with one grain of corn
Else she’ll be a true love of mine
And her daughter’s forever possessions of mine




Last week a friend also sent me an email that read: “This guy is freakin awesome!  (do the close up thing these are A-MAZING)  you have to check it out!!  you’re the only friend I have that will like this ( i think)  “)  Had to share!”  A link to the web site of an artist by the name of Thomas Kuebler was included ~   http://www.tskuebler.com 


After visiting the site this was my response:  “Freakin’ awesome is a great way to describe the art.  I agree wholeheartedly that he is a genius. Wow!  It is actually especially cool that he chooses unusual subjects, those that look different, perhaps ugly and even scary.  So much attention is given to conventional beauty. So much art focuses on classical beauty.”  

Here is a sculpture called Drink with the Devil and a description of the piece by the artist:


“Liquid courage he calls it, the power to do the things you’re afraid to try and to say the things you’ve been wanting to say.  And, when you sing you sound like an angel to your own ears.  Let the warmth rush in and slowly turn control of your will over to him.  Enjoy it, because tomorrow you’ll need him again.  In fact, you may find that once you’ve swallowed him, your courage turns to fear and you can’t live without him.”




Below is another art piece called Madame Orba.  Here is her description:  “The second child of a traveling gypsy dancer, Maleva bore evidence from birth of an affliction.  This aberration was the result of her mother’s indiscretion with a gypsy witch’s husband.  As a child, Maleva’s deformity was hidden with veil, but the gypsy witch’s curse could not be abated.  Maleva was burdened with the power to delve into even the darkest of souls and was forced to speak their truths.  As she grew older, Maleva traveled with her trib as ‘Madame Orba, the All Knowing.’  From village to village, townsfold deemed her a novelty freak until the wretched among them were exposed to the masses.  No, the skeletons never stayed in the closets when Madam Orba set up her tent.  All mysteries, lies and dirty little secrets saw the light of day by the time the tribe pulled up stakes and rolled off to the next town.”

When you think about the shadow and the dark side what thoughts or feelings rise up within you?


What about duality?  Do you sense any duality within yourself?  


If yes, does it create conflict within you or have you learned to accept or entwine the light and dark within yourself?


What about unresolvable dilemmas? Have you experienced the tug-of-war of wanting two opposite things at the same time?  


Examples: 
Commitment or freedom?
Playing it safe or taking risks?
Controlling or surrendering?














Other things to do in an exploration of duality, the shadow and the dark side:

Explore the art of Frida Kahlo, who also was not afraid to depict the macabre in life.    In fact, one interesting story about Frida goes like this according to Wikipedia ~ “Clare Booth Luce, an ardent admirer of Mexican artist Frida Kahlo, almost immediately commissioned Kahlo to paint a “recuerdo” (remembrance) portrait of their deceased mutual friend, so that in Kahlo’s words: ‘her life must not be forgotten’. Luce understood a recuerdo to be an idealized memorial portrait and was doubtless expecting a conventional over-the-fireplace portrait for her $400. After being shown in March in Paris, the completed painting arrived in August 1939: Luce claims she was so shocked by the unwrapped painting that she ‘almost passed out.’ What Kahlo created was a graphic, narrative ‘retablo’, detailing every step of Hale’s suicide. It depicts Hale standing on the balcony, falling to her death while also lying on the bloody pavement below.  Luce was so offended that she seriously considered destroying it; but instead she had sculptor Noguchi paint out the part of the legend that bore Luce’s name. Luce simply left the work crated up in the care of Frank Crowninshield, only to be presented with it again decades later, when Crowninshield’s heirs discovered it in storage. She donated it anonymously to the Phoenix Art Museum, where it was eventually outed as a Luce donation. The museum retains ownership, although the painting is frequently on tour in exhibitions of Kahlo’s works.  

Mojo Monday ~ Unresolvable Dilemmas

Michelle Fairchild

“I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love.” 

~ Mother Teresa




Learning 
to live with
unresolvable 
dilemmas

Those 
tug of wars
that pull
you this
way
and then
that way

Unresolvable 
dilemmas

Freedom or
commitment
free spirit or
responsibility
striving or
letting it be

Unresolvable 
dilemmas


Desire to control or
desire to surrender
wanting to play it safe or 
wanting to risk it all
desire to connect or
desire to separate

Unresolvable 
dilemmas


Mind’s eye or
mystic’s eye
trust or 
doubt
being alone or
being together

Unresolvable 
dilemmas

Sometimes
there isn’t 
really
a perfect
choice

Unresolvable 
dilemmas

Spiritual life or
material life
part of a team or
independent
taking action or
letting things happen
planning or
spontaneity

Unresolvable 
dilemmas

Life
is
full
of 
paradox


by Michelle Fairchild


___________________________________________


Learn more about paradox and learning to live with unresolvable dilemmas in the book Unflappable: 6 Steps to Staying Happy, Centered, Peaceful No Matter What by Ragini Elizabeth Michaels.




Mojo Monday ~ Redvolutionary

Michelle Fairchild

What is a Redvolutionary you might ask?  Well this is how author Sera Beak describes it for us: 


“A Redvolutionary is someone who does not play by the social, religious, cultural, sexual, or political rules.  She affects change by daring to be herself, forging a unique path, and serving her planet authentically through “ecstatic activism.”  She’s a kind of ‘spiritual superheroine,’ rebelling against dogma and ideology in order to experience a direct and intimate relationship with the divine.  She has a fearless commitment to truth and freedom, healing and empowerment, hot love, red wine and gold body glitter…for all.”




A few years ago I read a book by author Sera Beak called The Red Book: A Deliciously Unorthodox Approach to Igniting Your Divine Spark.  Out of the blue I recently began receiving newsletter updates from author Sera Beak about upcoming workshops here in California.  What seems like eons ago, I had signed up on her web site to receive updates from her, and my twin mommy brain vaguely recalls getting something a long time ago, but then nothing.  So, to start receiving new emails from this fascinating young author made me take notice.  I pulled the well-read and dog-eared book from my shelf and began refreshing myself with the delights inside.  I also re-visited her new web site and learned that over 3 years ago Sera stepped back from the path she was on at the time.  She said goodbye to a publishing deal for her second book and the production of a film. In her own words she puts the experience this way:  “Over 3 years ago, the Universe ripped me a new one, a new Red Heart that is, and a lot has changed.”  She goes into more detail in a keynote speech she gave in Spring 2012.  (You can watch the video on her web page by clicking here.)

Sera Beak

Sera Beak is a world traveled, Harvard-trained scholar of comparative religion, a spiritual cowgirl, and a redvolutionary.  She has whirled with Sufi dervishes, had a private meeting with the Dalai Lama on her 21st birthday, took the host from a Croatian Catholic mystic who had the stigmata and has experienced life-altering visions with shamans (and everything in between.)  Her book also received rave reviews from the likes of Sark, Neale Donald Walsch and Rob Brezny.  


Here is the preface, called Prelude to A Kiss:


“Do you ever get that funny feeling, slightly surreal and disorienting, maybe late at night or early in the morning, maybe right before lunchtime or perhaps when your friends are chatting, a lover is changing, a job is droning, or a TV is flickering, a feeling that there’s something more than all of this?  That you are more than all of this?  That perhaps life is more purposeful and magical than you give it credit for, and never mind all your unpaid parking tickets and bad work days that seem to prove otherwise?


You do?  Me, too.  As does your best friend, your boss, and your weird neighbor.  As do Russian rocket scientists, Belgian sheep farmers, and the Dalai Lama.  The feeling is, in fact, universal.


So, what is this funny feeling?  Sure, you could explain it away as some Freudian childhood glitch or planetary retrograde or even some of last night’s margaritas coming up for an encore.  But more likely, it’s something a bit more profound.  Chances are it’s a coy catcall from the universe, disguised as existential angst.  It’s the divine ringing your inner doorbell.  It’s your higher self, stealing the spotlight.  It’s your potential, aching to be realized, and your spirit, itching to be scratched.  So then the question becomes, what are you going to do about it?  Are you going to explore this feeling?  Are you willing to open the door?  Are you willing to refocus your lens?”

Author Sera Beak ~ Ignite Your Divine Spark

Chapter 1, called Light the Match: Set Your Intentions Free, begins off like this:


“So how the hell do you start igniting your divine spark?  Well, first and foremost, start by setting your intention.  Your intention is the energy, the electric charge, the awareness you bring to every aspect of your life.  It’s the force that  lies behind everything you do, the fuel for your fire.  Your intention helps create the pathway for your experience; therefore, setting it ain’t no trifling, careless thing, but a responsibility, one not to be taken lightly…


Setting your intention is a bit like offering up an invocation to the universe.  You place your desire out in the world, as an energized thought, a pregnant idea, an open prayer.  You envision how you would like to be, to feel, to progress…


You can state your intentions every morning before you get out of bed; it’s like applying an all-day moisturizer for your spirit: ‘I intend to be divinely aware and connected today, no matter what.’  You can sing them in the shower: ‘ I intend to follow my gut on this business deal and make it soar.’  You can let your intention move through your body during  a yoga class: ‘ I intend from now on to be healthier with my eating and exercise habits, and to love my strong, sexy body.’  Or set it when you take  stroll in the park: ‘ I intend to genuinely smile at every thing and every body I come across.’  You can set an intention for the coming day, week, year, or lifetime, or just for the moment you are in right now.  It’s really that simple.  If you don’t have a specific intention to set, just sit still, check in with your heart, and start sensing how you would ideally want to feel in your job, in your personal relationships, in your body, in your life, in your relationship with the divine.  Hold these feelings strongly for a moment in your mind and heart, and then release them, breathe them out into the world.”


In what ways do you inspire/conspire to be Redvolutionary?


What Sparks are you feeling/experiencing right now in your life?  


If Sparks are lacking, what might you dare to do to ignite some?


Have you set any intentions for yourself?  

**One great way to get inspiration for your intentions is to participate in !Spark!, a Cosmic Cowgirl University offering, that inspires and supports you for thirty days in achieving your intentions.  The next session starts September 1st and you can learn more here.





There is much about Sera Beak that hollers Cosmic Cowgirl, in addition to her self-proclaimed Spiritual Cowgirl identity, Spark, Divinity, Red, Intentions, Revolutionary,  Daring, Glitter… and Oh, the list goes on and on.   She had been working on a book called The Red Book of Chakras three years ago, until her life took an unexpected detour.  She offers this particular book for sale on her web site.  She shares this about it: This was the book I started to write three years ago before my ass got kicked by the universe.  While my writing style and focus has changed since then, this book still packs a power-full punch of She-force and that’s way I’m sharing it with you all now.  Enjoy!


She is now working on her official second book called Red Hot and Holy: A Heretic’s Love Story and she still has intentions to complete and release the film called Redvolution: Dare to Disturb the Universe.


Sera is offering some amazing workshops in California, along with other opportunities to work with her, and you can learn more about that here.


Mojo Monday ~ Whimsy In the Garden

Michelle Fairchild

There is something so refreshing and fun about creativity and whimsy in nature.  I spotted a fun photo on Pinterest and followed the link back to the creator of the above signs.  The website where this image can be found is called Fresh Picked Whimsy and the blogger is artist Lori.  Her original post about how this sign came into existence can be found here.

What I loved seeing is how this project started off with a creative idea and a pile of old wood.  The photo to the left shows the pile of unused wood that was just waiting for a creative artist to come along.  


The simplicity of taking what is already readily available and turning it into an adorable garden art piece is brilliant.  


Look how simple it was to create in the following images.  First pick out some pieces. Next paint them.  




Lastly, add locations that have meaning to your life.  If you want to add the distance, simply look it up on google maps or some other on-line mapping program.  Have fun with the lettering. Lori did a beautiful job on these by using white and black to create some dimension to the letters.  I also loved a suggestion on Pinterest that stated you could also include dates for when you visited these various places on the back.  


What are you waiting for, go forth and create whimsy!



Mojo Monday ~ We Are All Meant to Shine!

Michelle Fairchild

“Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
 so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.”
~ Marianne Williamson
Come sit down.  Make yourself comfortable.  If it was winter I would tell you to go ahead curl up on the couch, with a soft cuddly blanket to keep you warm, and I would serve you some hot Moroccan mint tea, my favorite.  However in my neck of the woods it is summer and we are in the midst of our annual triple digit days.  So instead I will invite you to sit in a lounge chair in our backyard, and you can put your feet in the cool water of our kiddie pool, while we enjoy some cold ice tea together.   

Now that you are settled in I want to share with you how round these Cosmic Cowgirl parts we have been discussing the topic perspective.  I have two very simple points of view to present about life perspectives:

The first one is: Life’s too short not to wear a red boa.
The second one is: We are all meant to shine!
You may have giggled when I told you that life is too short not to wear a red boa.  Quite a few people do.  You may have even laughed when I surprised you by draping a red boa around your shoulders.  The other possibility is that you looked at me like I wasn’t quite all there, wondering what was up with this red boa thing.
Well, the philosophy of The Red Boa, as I like to refer to it in short, is about having more fun and enjoying life more in the present.  Now this approach to life may come easily to some folks.  There are people with naturally positive, happy and laid back attitudes.  However, I recognize that for some individuals this way of being can be very foreign and it can take some actual effort at first to practice at lightening up.  There are also plenty of people who, like myself, fall somewhere in the middle of that spectrum.  Of course there are always going to be tough life experiences that come along now and again and can make it tough to see the brighter side to things.  There are a number of things that can help us all to keep perspective about this thing called life.  The first one, while it may seem a bit morbid, it is to remember that this thing called life is not a permanent gig that will last forever.  Every single one of us on this planet has an expiration date, it may be many years from now, or it may arrive sooner than that.  The reality can be uncomfortable to consider, but when taken into consideration can help us keep things in perspective.
Let me assure you that I don’t walk around with rainbows shooting out of my ears, sprinkling happy glitter while I skip through city streets nor do I have birds and friendly animals scampering around me while I sing angelically in a forest.  On occasion I do wear glitter and truth be told I may bust a move while cleaning the house, especially if a band like the Gipsy Kings is playing.  
Sometimes my life feels grand and sometimes I want to scream “get me out of here.” Many wonderful things have occurred in my time here on planet earth.  My life has been full of abundance and I always try to be grateful for all that I have.   My life has also been affected by tragic and deep loss and I have even experienced depression.  A few years ago in fact I went through what I describe as a dark night of the soul.  Yet somehow I have always managed to return to what I call a sunshine spot.  Sometimes the return trip to my sunshine spot is quick and I stay there for an extended period of time.  Sometimes I can’t find my way back there for a long time, and those are the hardest times of course.  I won’t delve into all the details of my soul’s story right now, but I believe there is much we can learn from one another’s life stories.  Especially when brave souls come forth to share how they triumphed over adversity and chose to rise above it all.
Perhaps even after the introduction to The Red Boa philosophy you are still asking yourself “But why a red boa?”  I am here to tell you that wearing a feather red boa can be transformative.  There is something about a feather boa that is sassy, playful, mischievous, sexy and a little bit wild.  If the thought of being “wild” sounds a little intimidating consider what reknowned writer Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Ph.D writes about the “wild woman” in her introduction to Women Who Run with the Wolves:
“Within every woman there is a wild and natural creature, a powerful force, filled with good instincts, passionate creativity, and ageless knowing.  Her name is Wild Woman, but she is an endangered species.  Though the gifts of the wildish nature come to us at birth, society’s attempt to “civilize” us into rigid roles has plundered this treasure, and muffled the deep, life-giving messages of our own souls.  Without Wild Woman, we become over-domesticated, fearful, uncreative, trapped.”

If you do not yet own a feathered boa add it to your shopping list right now.    Then make up reasons to wear it.  For example, on my 30th birthday (which unbelievably was 13 years ago) I had my birthday party at a roller skating rink.  My family and friends requested lots of disco music (think Michael Jackson Off The Wall) and a few of us even wore feathered boas while skating.  I for one, am the owner of a rather fabulous collection of feather boas.  I often incorporate them into Halloween costumes too.  There is the flamingo pink boa, the fire red and orange boa, the parrot rainbow boa, as well as boas in simple black, red, green and blue. The photo collage (top left and then counter clockwise) above features me as “Fire,” a rainbow parrot with my twin kittens, a pink flamingo, and then see how I use the rainbow one for decoration by framing a mirror in my art room.  

The reality is that I am a regular run-of-the-mill woman.  I have my low melancholy times, I get angry and feel impatient.  My figure will never walk a fashion show runway and from time to time I even have (gasp) bad hair days.  Yet, underneath there is also my wild woman, who occasionally howls at the moon, has danced in a bar cage and in the rain in Paris, and will when needed (or just for the hell of it) break out the glitter and feathers to help me keep that Red Boa perspective.
Put on
that red boa,
fling it round
your shoulders,
shimmy shake
those full
feminine hips
take pride
 in your stride
delight
 in the tickle
the caress
 of the feathers
feel your skin
oh how good
 it is to be you
one of a kind
a singular creation
of love


What do you do or could you do to stay in touch with your wild woman?

How do you keep perspective (or your cool), if you even do, when the shit hits the fan?

Do you own a feathered boa?  If not, what are you waiting for??

Mojo Monday ~ The Cowgirl’s Guide to Riding Wild Donkeys

Michelle Fairchild

A brilliant email landed in my email box this weekend from Leonie, formerly known as Goddess Leonie.  She offered for FREE, her book called The Cowgirl’s Guide to Riding Wild Donkeys.  As a member of a women’s tribe called The Cosmic Cowgirls, I have to say that seeing the word cowgirl in her title made me happy inside.  


Now here is what Leonie offers in her brilliant (and FREE) Project Finisher Ebook:


* Her secret to producing and creating effortlessly, easily + with ridunkulous amounts of joy
* How to get your projects finished + out into the world in record time 
* How to transform your biz + creative practice with this simple, powerful technique 
* The secret to making your ideas into real, finished, tangible creations that can touch the world + give you gorgeous income!


Here is one of the fun pages from the book:




















To get your FREE copy of this delightful book visit Leonie at her web site by clicking here. 


Here is the full web address:
http://leoniedawson.com/free-the-project-finisher-ebook-how-to-finish-your-projects-get-them-out-into-the-world/

Mojo Monday ~ Releasing the Past

Michelle Fairchild

“Removing an arrow/error like believing your past 
was the BEST and your future is less bright, 
is easier said than done, if you know what I mean. 
We get a LOT out of holding onto the the things that harm us, don’t we? 
I know as long as my past is better than my future, 
I cannot call in the future that is mine from a pure heart, 
or as Dr. E puts it: ‘clean, calm, clear heart’.” 

~ Shiloh Sophia McCloud 
Sharing from her experiences at 
Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes’ 
SoulFire Vision Quest in June 2012

The past can be an anchor holding you back.
When I read the words above that Shiloh Sophia McCloud wrote they literally leapt off the page at me. Fairly recently I had found myself in a bit of a funk and during this time frame I also happened to flip through some old photographs.  Some were of my days of living and traveling in Europe.  Others were of me in my college days and with various friends sharing fun experiences.  I found myself wistful of my youth, my courage, my appearance (one that required I work out damn hard to achieve), my freedom and some of my relationships.  The words Shiloh wrote spoke to me deeply though.  At the age of 43 was I really ready to declare the best years of my life were over?  Was I really thinking that nothing fabulous would/could happen that might make those experiences of my twenties and thirties seem small in comparison?  When had I grown so disillusioned, jaded and skeptical?  Was I going to throw in the towel and live my life talking about the good ol’ days and the “remember whens”?  Heck, I had to admit that I was falling into that pattern.  

Recently I also made some observations about we humans.  I saw first hand how easy it is for we humans to hold onto the past in a death grip of remembrances, and not in a good way.  It is fairly common for people to keep track of the hurts and the ways we have been wronged.  I make no judgments of this tendency, because most of us have been there at some point or other, and according to psychological research it is now believed that it is in our human nature that bad events wear off more slowly than good ones.  Here is a quote from an article called Praise Is Fleeting, but Brickbats We Recall by Alina Tugend, “As with many other quirks of the human psyche, there may be an evolutionary basis for this. Those who are ‘more attuned to bad things would have been more likely to survive threats and, consequently, would have increased the probability of passing along their genes,’ the article states. ‘Survival requires urgent attention to possible bad outcomes but less urgent with regard to good ones.'”

I have personally experienced my own propensity to remember the bad, as well as witnessed that of others. I have found it sad to observe once close and treasured friendships crumble because of one or two negative interactions, in spite of years of wonderful times spent together.  I have also witnessed someone complaining and talking about their resentment for events that took place 30+ years ago.  Yet reminding someone that those events are far in the past, cannot be changed and really don’t have to affect them in their current life, isn’t often productive.  You can’t make someone else see through your eyes how they are allowing their old resentments to steal their happiness in their present life.  Again I don’t judge anyone that is stuck in such a place.  There is a time when it might be necessary to delve into the past in order to really get the muck out and heal it.   When Oprah and Iyanla Vanzant teamed up earlier this year Iyanla stated that in order to heal our pain three things to need to happen, we have to feel our pain, we have to deal with it (really deal with it) and then we can heal it.  Feel, Deal, Heal.  She also bluntly told a former addict that while he was no longer using drugs and drinking alcohol that he was now addicted to his story and that he needed to move on because he was the only one standing in the way of his happiness. 

I am also here to share that Cosmic Cowgirls has a secret weapon when it comes to transforming one’s pain and past into glitter and gold.  The remedy is art and writing one’s Legendary Story.  All of our lives offer us up the most wonderful material for a kick-in-the pants, rollicking, roll-in-the-hay read.  That bar fight you had back in 1995, don’t you dare leave it out, and your stories from when you raced wild with a roller derby team called The Angry Beavers will be sure to have your readers staying up all night.  If you danced in a cage or on tables in a bar tell us all about it.  Perhaps you lived in Europe and had several foreign lovers.  Hmm….now we are getting to some good stuff.  Yet, there are the tougher stories, perhaps the boyfriend or husband who cheated and left you for Paris Hilton.  There might even be tragedy, the fiance who died in a car accident or the abusive childhood you survived.   All of these provide you with a champions story and the back story to who you are today.  If you have any doubts about that one pop on over to Effy Wild’s blog called The Glitterhood and begin reading her powerful and moving mini-memoir. 


As we are beginning our Legendary journals over at the Red Key Vision Quest consider what stories you have to tell.


Is there something that you first need to feel, deal and heal?


Do you feel addicted to any of your stories that are causing you pain and keeping you from moving forward in your journey?  (feel free to share or think about privately)


Which stories or experiences of yours first come to mind when you think of the word Legendary?


With love and encouragement to shine, shine, shine!
Michelle


** Mojo Monday was born in May 2010 and has been featured on Cosmic Cowgirls Rodeo of the Soul since that time.  Mojo Monday offers up inspiration, interesting ideas, questions and more to get our week off and running.  We like to gather around the campfire and share  our stories and our experiences with one another.


In 2011 Steph Cowling who currently resides in Brooklyn, New York, joined the Mojo Monday team and inspired us all for a year with her incredibly thoughtful writing and her beautiful photography.  Fortunately you can still find her writing in her column Soul In the City in Cosmic Cowgirls Magazine.


This year the inspirational Trish O’Mally is co-facilitating Mojo Mondays with me.  Her writing carries magic within it and if you attend a Cosmic Cowgirl Conference you may get to experience her gastronomical brilliance as well.