The Red Boa Perspective



Today in Cosmic Cowgirls Magazine
is my latest article called 


Perspectives are a lot like opinions in that everyone has them.  I am quite intrigued by perspectives.  Much like our opinions, our perspectives are also formed and influenced by our perceived identities and our life experiences.  Yet just as our identities can change during the course of our lives, so will our perspectives transform and evolve.
However, I have this suspicion that the one perspective at the core of them all is the one you have of yourself.  Do you think highly of yourself?  Do you think you are lovable? Do you love yourself?  Do you see your beauty?
Did those questions make you pause or did you feel immediate conviction in your answers?
Buddha quote and photo by Michelle Fairchild

Buddha quote with photo by Michelle Fairchild
To read more come visit this article at Cosmic Cowgirls Magazine

We Are Stardust

Today in Cosmic Cowgirls Magazine
is my latest article called 


Can you wrap your mind around the reality
that both you and I are literally made of stardust? 
How does an identity of being made of stars feel when you try it on? 

Do you stand a little taller? 
Does it blow your mind, just a little, or maybe a lot? 

Does it make you want to swagger or maybe
just stare up at the night sky and say
“Why hello there my friend, I had no idea we were related?”


(p.s. ~ the Symphony of Science video at the end is quite moving)

Mojo Monday ~ Who Are You?

Who Are You?
Next month the theme for Cosmic Cowgirls Magazine will be Identity.  I thought it would be fun to revisit a Mojo Monday post from a couple of years ago that asked the question “Who are you?”
A few years back the fost-adoption agency I work for brought in a presenter for a two-day management training. We did some interesting interactive activities. I wanted to share some of them because I thought they might prove interesting for you to try at home with a family member or a friend. Additionally it can be interesting to try it in a group as well. The process can lead to some interesting discussions and realizations about yourself and those you know or think you know.

The first activity was to start off by pairing off with another person. Before we were given the question we would be asking we were to choose who would ask the question and who would answer. The question was “Who are you?” and one of the persons had to ask this question over and over for a minute, with the other person answering again and again, maybe with a different response, maybe repeating some answers. After the minute the partners then switched and went through the same process for another minute. Then finally they would switch back and forth for one more additional minute.
The next question we asked and went through the same process again was “When you are afraid who do you pretend to be?”
Following these exchanges we then gathered back into a larger circle and we then had to take turns standing behind our question & answer partner and introduce our partner as if we were he or she by stating the following.
Hi my name is: ___________
I am a ____________ person.
In order for me to feel safe I need ________________ from the group.
Later we did another rather fun activity. This one will require you to write down some simple answers and later I can reveal more about what your answers mean.
1) Write down your favorite color. Now list three adjectives for this color.
2) Write down your favorite animal. Now list three adjectives for this animal.
3) Write down the word “Night” and list three adjectives.
4) Write down the word “Water” and list three adjectives.
I will tell you more about what these mean below.  Be sure not to peek
😉
Another very interesting test to take is the Human Metrics Personality Test
The results will tell you the following:
  • Your type formula according to Carl Jung and Isabel Briggs Myers typology along with the strengths of the preferences
  • The description of your personality type
  • The list of occupations and educational institutions where you can get relevant degree or training, most suitable for your personality type – Jung Career Indicator™
Share your answers to the questions above and if you take the Human Metrics test come back and share your results.

If you take the time to try the “Who are you?” answer and question exchange with a friend or family member share what came up during the exchange.


Scroll down for answers to questions.










Answers to questions:

1) Your favorite color and descriptive words represents how you see yourself.

2) Your favorite animal and the adjectives represents how others see you.

3) The word “Night” represents death and the adjectives describe how you feel about death.

4) The word “Water” represents sex and the adjectives describe your thoughts/feelings about sex.


My results from the questions were as follows:

1) Fav Color – Black: deep, profound, inclusive

2) Fav animal – Lion & Eagle: Lions majestic, strong, confident; Eagle free, adventurous, visionary

3) Night – contemplative, restful, peaceful

4) Water – Source, life-giving, spiritual

My Human Metrics/Meyres Briggs test resulted in INFJ (introvert, intuitive, feeling, judging) which is referred to as the Idealist Counselor.

Mystical Filament of the Heart



This month in Cosmic Cowgirls Magazine 
we have all been contemplating and writing 
about the term Community. 


Come read my latest article called Mystical Filament of the Heart

“…the capacity of the mystical filament of heart that if listened to,
will lead us beyond what we know into the
depth of our common humanity,
into that place where none of us are strangers.”
~ Mark Nepo
Red Thread Love by Michelle Fairchild
Red Thread Love by Michelle Fairchild

Mojo Monday ~ Releasing the Past


Removing an arrow/error like believing your past 
was the BEST and your future is less bright, 
is easier said than done, if you know what I mean. 
We get a LOT out of holding onto the the things that harm us, don’t we? 
I know as long as my past is better than my future, 
I cannot call in the future that is mine from a pure heart, 
or as Dr. E puts it: ‘clean, calm, clear heart’.” 

~ Shiloh Sophia McCloud 
Sharing from her experiences at 
Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes’ 
SoulFire Vision Quest in June 2012

The past can be an anchor holding you back.
When I read the words above that Shiloh Sophia McCloud wrote they literally leapt off the page at me. Fairly recently I had found myself in a bit of a funk and during this time frame I also happened to flip through some old photographs.  Some were of my days of living and traveling in Europe.  Others were of me in my college days and with various friends sharing fun experiences.  I found myself wistful of my youth, my courage, my appearance (one that required I work out damn hard to achieve), my freedom and some of my relationships.  The words Shiloh wrote spoke to me deeply though.  At the age of 43 was I really ready to declare the best years of my life were over?  Was I really thinking that nothing fabulous would/could happen that might make those experiences of my twenties and thirties seem small in comparison?  When had I grown so disillusioned, jaded and skeptical?  Was I going to throw in the towel and live my life talking about the good ol’ days and the “remember whens”?  Heck, I had to admit that I was falling into that pattern.  

Recently I also made some observations about we humans.  I saw first hand how easy it is for we humans to hold onto the past in a death grip of remembrances, and not in a good way.  It is fairly common for people to keep track of the hurts and the ways we have been wronged.  I make no judgments of this tendency, because most of us have been there at some point or other, and according to psychological research it is now believed that it is in our human nature that bad events wear off more slowly than good ones.  Here is a quote from an article called Praise Is Fleeting, but Brickbats We Recall by Alina Tugend, “As with many other quirks of the human psyche, there may be an evolutionary basis for this. Those who are ‘more attuned to bad things would have been more likely to survive threats and, consequently, would have increased the probability of passing along their genes,’ the article states. ‘Survival requires urgent attention to possible bad outcomes but less urgent with regard to good ones.'”

I have personally experienced my own propensity to remember the bad, as well as witnessed that of others. I have found it sad to observe once close and treasured friendships crumble because of one or two negative interactions, in spite of years of wonderful times spent together.  I have also witnessed someone complaining and talking about their resentment for events that took place 30+ years ago.  Yet reminding someone that those events are far in the past, cannot be changed and really don’t have to affect them in their current life, isn’t often productive.  You can’t make someone else see through your eyes how they are allowing their old resentments to steal their happiness in their present life.  Again I don’t judge anyone that is stuck in such a place.  There is a time when it might be necessary to delve into the past in order to really get the muck out and heal it.   When Oprah and Iyanla Vanzant teamed up earlier this year Iyanla stated that in order to heal our pain three things to need to happen, we have to feel our pain, we have to deal with it (really deal with it) and then we can heal it.  Feel, Deal, Heal.  She also bluntly told a former addict that while he was no longer using drugs and drinking alcohol that he was now addicted to his story and that he needed to move on because he was the only one standing in the way of his happiness. 

I am also here to share that Cosmic Cowgirls has a secret weapon when it comes to transforming one’s pain and past into glitter and gold.  The remedy is art and writing one’s Legendary Story.  All of our lives offer us up the most wonderful material for a kick-in-the pants, rollicking, roll-in-the-hay read.  That bar fight you had back in 1995, don’t you dare leave it out, and your stories from when you raced wild with a roller derby team called The Angry Beavers will be sure to have your readers staying up all night.  If you danced in a cage or on tables in a bar tell us all about it.  Perhaps you lived in Europe and had several foreign lovers.  Hmm….now we are getting to some good stuff.  Yet, there are the tougher stories, perhaps the boyfriend or husband who cheated and left you for Paris Hilton.  There might even be tragedy, the fiance who died in a car accident or the abusive childhood you survived.   All of these provide you with a champions story and the back story to who you are today.  If you have any doubts about that one pop on over to Effy Wild’s blog called The Glitterhood and begin reading her powerful and moving mini-memoir. 


As we are beginning our Legendary journals over at the Red Key Vision Quest consider what stories you have to tell.


Is there something that you first need to feel, deal and heal?


Do you feel addicted to any of your stories that are causing you pain and keeping you from moving forward in your journey?  (feel free to share or think about privately)


Which stories or experiences of yours first come to mind when you think of the word Legendary?


With love and encouragement to shine, shine, shine!
Michelle


** Mojo Monday was born in May 2010 and has been featured on Cosmic Cowgirls Rodeo of the Soul since that time.  Mojo Monday offers up inspiration, interesting ideas, questions and more to get our week off and running.  We like to gather around the campfire and share  our stories and our experiences with one another.


In 2011 Steph Cowling who currently resides in Brooklyn, New York, joined the Mojo Monday team and inspired us all for a year with her incredibly thoughtful writing and her beautiful photography.  Fortunately you can still find her writing in her column Soul In the City in Cosmic Cowgirls Magazine.


This year the inspirational Trish O’Mally is co-facilitating Mojo Mondays with me.  Her writing carries magic within it and if you attend a Cosmic Cowgirl Conference you may get to experience her gastronomical brilliance as well.

Mojo Monday ~ Am I Pretty

My most recent article in the Cosmic Cowgirls Magazine is called Am I Pretty?
One of the quotes I ask readers to contemplate is from
Women Who Run with the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estés, PhD:

“Destroying a woman’s instinctive affiliation with her natural body
cheats her of confidence. It causes her to perseverate
about whether she is a good person or not, and bases her
self-worth on how she looks instead of who she is.
It keeps her preoccupied , colors everything she does, plans, and anticipates.
It is unthinkable in the instinctive world
that a woman should live preoccupied by appearance this way
.”
Come read the complete article over at the
Cosmic Cowgirl’s Magazine by visiting this web link:

Life Vest Inside

A couple of weeks ago I saw this incredible video called the Kindness Boomerang. I was intrigued by who created it and the story behind it all. My search led me to the founder, Orly Wahba, who created the non-profit Life Vest Inside. We corresponded and our sharing led to me writing about her and this inspirational organization in the Cosmic Cowgirls Magazine. Come watch the video and read the article and prepare to be inspired!

(Note the video is also featured at the end of the article)